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Stories from the Nightside discussion

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[TR] - Take Away Tom :: The Art Village :: The Word Gallery :: Word Gallery Discussion

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Post by Altera Fri Feb 05, 2010 3:30 pm

What do you guys think of my stories, like the ones here? Constructive Criticism is appreciated.

Also if you'd like to appear in the fic, just ask and I'll add you somewhere.:3


Last edited by Altera on Sat Jul 10, 2010 4:50 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Post by Flaw of Insanity Fri Feb 05, 2010 3:50 pm

<3 Kiwi reference. Pretty good so far, I can't wait for more.
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Post by Altera Fri Feb 05, 2010 3:54 pm

Kiwi is one of my IRL friends who sometimes plays AQW. Working on Chapter 2 now.
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Post by Valosity Sat Feb 06, 2010 11:37 pm

It's quite good! But you have a typo to let you know:
Off course there’s only so much one can cook on a campfire and
Supposed to be "Of".
Anyways, I can't think of much that isn't perfect! I only have seen typos pretty much... or puncuation missing:
“Yeah I’m looking for an oven.”
You forgot the comma there, right after the "Yeah" it should be "Yeah,"...
“Anything in particular that you’d like.""
Should be "“Anything in particular that you’d like?" not without the question mark.

Well, that's all! Hope you have a good chapter 2, there's really nothing not good about it!


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Post by Altera Sun Feb 07, 2010 2:40 am

Thanks for pointing those out Valosity. Just went back to correct them.
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Post by Valosity Sun Feb 07, 2010 3:25 am

No problem, thier the only thing I could find wrong in the whole thing...


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Post by Altera Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:39 pm

Second Chapter's posted... thoughts?
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Post by Crystal Lion Mon Mar 01, 2010 6:11 pm

Actually getting it in to my house required a bit of work

Should be
Actually getting it into my house required a bit of work

“I haven’t found a couch to suit.
I think you should add something after 'suit', the sentence feels rather incomplete.

I liked the part where you blackmailed Vesper about the Guru Forest incident. Made me laugh to myself.
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Post by Vampiric Wed Mar 03, 2010 6:14 pm

Nice story! I'm quite enjoying the story so far and how you've incorporated the different places in Lore and tied them in. You've made me curious about the Guru Forest incident though... will that be revealed in the future or must we speculate endlessly?

I also liked the second chapter because of the interaction between the friends. Makes the story more amusing ;)
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Post by Altera Wed Mar 03, 2010 7:05 pm

I'm thinking of adding the Guru Forest Incident as a side story between later chapters. In the meantime you'll have to speculate :3
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Post by Altera Thu Jun 17, 2010 6:38 pm

Just posted a possible scene for my original fiction story. Clicky!!

Not sure whether I'll post chapter 3 of "The Great Cookie War", the "Guru Forest Incident" side story, or the first chapter of my Mechquest fanfic next.
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Post by Altera Sat Jul 10, 2010 4:31 pm

New chapter for the Great Cookie War is posted... Have a look see!
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Post by Altera Sun Aug 01, 2010 6:13 pm

Posted the first chapter of the Mechquest fic.

Wouldn't mind some constructive criticism.

I'll slowly start posting my literature to dA. Just not at the moment. Because it's after 11pm. Yeah.
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Post by Altera Sun Oct 24, 2010 3:46 pm

Posted the first chapter of a new Dragonfable fic. Thoughts? CCs? Bananafish?
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Post by Altera Thu Feb 17, 2011 11:14 am

Posted a random DF oneshot.
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