Re: TR's Cave Adventures

by **Juliana** Tue Apr 05, 2011 8:07 am

This isn't H&H, Darre...

by **Erik** Tue Apr 05, 2011 8:13 am

^This. And I have no idea what H&H is either, but I agree that this might be much easier than real dwarf fortress.

by **DigDog** Tue Apr 05, 2011 8:27 am

Darre wrote:"A medium sized creature prone to great stupidity."
Reading my bio, good times.

Every bio has that sentence as far as I know.

by **Tim Hortans** Tue Apr 05, 2011 8:30 am

They have variations to that sentence like "A small sized creatures, prone to anger."

by V Wed Apr 06, 2011 4:52 am

Off topic/negative/drama posts deleted for violating Rule 10.
(In the future Mods/Admins, please simply delete the posts rather than encouraging the topic to be continued.)

by **Tim Hortans** Wed Apr 06, 2011 5:36 am

>mfw deleted
>yfw i have no face
>yfw neither do you
>mfw we are all faceless

Also I have been playing Dwarf Fortress again. After I filled a room with stairs by accident, I recently restarted. I JUST DESTROYED THE WAGON HELL YES.

by Peregrine Tue Apr 12, 2011 5:32 pm

So because I gave you all extremely nice rooms the nobles are going into suicidal BERSERKEERRRR mode because they're so jealous of the nice rooms we have that they don't and the fort is currently descending into chaos. One noble is dead, and Void the armorer and myself are both injured pretty bad. Only thing I can see that'll fix the problem is abandoning the bedroom level and having to remake it somewhere else, which sounds pretty crappy to me who hates doing bedrooms with a passion, nevermind REDOING bedrooms.

Anyway, journals later. If the fort crumbles it's uhhh. Let's see. It's DigDog's fault. Yeah. That sounds about right to me.

by Peregrine Wed Apr 13, 2011 5:50 am

I'm double posting.

TOTALREBEL.JPG

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 17th of Limestone.
Chamberino finished that armour today. Three MASTERWORK adamantine breastplates, three MASTERWORK sets of adamantine gauntlets, three MASTERWORK adamantine greaves, three MASTERWORK adamantine helms, three MASTERWORK adamantine pairs of boots, one MASTERWORK adamantine shield, one MASTERWORK adamantine sword, two MASTERWORK steel maces and one MASTERWORK steel hammer.

Cial, Tom and I suited up and posed as a team. This cave just got real.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 20th of Limestone.
AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH THAT ANIMAL DISSECTOR EMPRESS KEEPS SCREAMING ABOUT HER GRIGGIT. OH MY GOD SHE SAYS IT'S THIRSTY AND THAT THERE'S NO WATER EVEN THOUGH THERE'S A WELL RIGHT THERE AND THEN WHEN SOMEONE POINTS OUT THE WELL SHE STARTS SCREAMING SHE DOESN'T HAVE A BUCKET EVEN THOUGH SHE'S HOLDING ONE WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER OH MY GOD THE SCREAMING IS ECHOING IN THE CAVERN IT'S SO ANNOYING.

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUUUUT UPPP:

OH GOD MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP PLEASE JUST MAKE IT STOP AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MAKE IT STOP NO PLEASE NO MORE UHWHGWEGWNGBEGHWGNG [the rest of the page is too smeared from uncontrollable sobbing to be read]

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 6th of Sandstone.
Some more migrants arrived today. These ones were led by some old fart with a beard called Kaotic.

Kaotic: I AM THE WISE MAN KAOTIC, AND MY FOLLOWERS AND I HAVE COME TO IMPART WISDOM UPON YOU ADVENTURERS.
Erik: Go ahead.
Kaotic: DON'T RUN WITH SCISSORS.
Peregrine: ...
Kaotic: IT'S ALL FUN AND GAMES UNTIL SOMEBODY LOSES AN EYE.

Great. Just who we needed. Someone totally useless to feed.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 6th of Moonstone.
We've got some bedrooms finished. They're looking really nice. Covered in masterwork engravings, and WOODEN beds. I thought we were going to have to make rock beds. That would have been uncomfortable. Fortunately we had some wood lying around. It's like sleeping in my very own royal palace. Everyone is very happy. Except me.

I couldn't help but notice a lot of babies in mothers arms. Cial and Erik have two. DigDog and Chamb have two. Void and Tom have one. Vamp and that subpar bowyer Automaton have one. Tim and the herbalist Uncanny-valley have one. It's ridiculous. For the love of God guys, we only JUST finished rooms today.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 19th of Moonstone.
Werewolves showed up to trade with us. Then they left. When I asked what we had gotten from them, I got a "nothing" in response.

Apparently, the entire time they were here, our broker was "on break".

Great. The one job the guy has to do once a year and he doesn't do it.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 17th of Opal.
Some metalcrafter decided to whip together this piece of crap. Apparently they didn't understand the adamantine was valuable and limited.

TR's Cave Adventures - Page 4 2m68u42

Still, can't go wrong with a name like Persuasivechildrens Card Gamer.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 17th of Slate.
We've finally finished our grand project! The tower-cap inn, named as such by the fact there's a tower-cap tree growing in it. The stairs lead up to a service corridor that leads to bedrooms. It's just like Yulgar's back home, only without the hundreds of weapons lying around absolutely everywhere.

TR's Cave Adventures - Page 4 Ogjomp

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, Eh, whenever.
Eh, more migrants.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 22nd of Hematite.
One of the migrants from earlier has started calling themselves "big boss" despite being just a fish dissector. They've been making demands too. What an idiot.

Also of note is that the broker sucks. When the traders came in, he went "oh thank goodness you guys are here, we need this stuff to survive". The next thing we know, prices have trippled. Great job. We practically just got robbed by these jerks.

TR's Cave Adventures - Page 4 2d75y5y

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 5th of Galena.
More migrants. "Big boss" has recruited a few of them into her collection of "nobles". We've now got a tax collector running around, and a dungeon keeper, a diplomat, a record keeper, a manager, an architect, and whatever other generally ridiculous noble titles big boss whipped off the top of her head. It wouldn't be so bad if they weren't all making demands.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 9th of Limestone.
Remember that griggit that died earlier? Well big boss threw a tantrum today over the griggit's "pretentious" burial accomodations. Apparently the dolomite coffin it was buried in was worth about 100 dorfbucks. She beat up Void in her rage. Poor guy. He's looking pretty badly beat up. Hopefully it doesn't get infected, no one here knows how to make soap.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 7th of Sandstone.
Even more migrants. This is getting ridiculous, don't these people realize this is a cave? Some elk attacked the migrants and I ended up having to go outside and defend them. Got speared by some elk horns as a result. My shoulders are pretty badly cut up. I'm now stuck in this makeshift hospital with Void waiting on DigDog to patch us up.

Cial came in earlier to mention the "good news". Apparently big boss had gone berserk and started smashing up her room, so Tom went in there and killed her. I understood she was upset about the coffin, but I didn't expect her to lose her life over it.

TR's Cave Adventures - Page 4 Mhfrxv

Due to some bug fixes to the game and the issues I mentioned in my previous post I'm interested in moving from this cave into a new cave soon. As a result everyone's genders, personalities, appearances and romances might chance and also your babies might cease to exist. Please tell me what you all think of this.

by **Tom Gaskarth** Wed Apr 13, 2011 5:57 am

HAMMERING LIKE A BOSS.

by **Darre** Wed Apr 13, 2011 7:59 am

Baby making and bugs. YAY, classic Cave Adventures right there.

by Kaotic Wed Apr 13, 2011 12:39 pm

Some decent advice right there. It'd be typical if one of you guys died via tripping with scissors.
Anyways, I'm an old man, but my description says I'm a female? El oh el, Lady Gaga.

by Peregrine Wed Apr 13, 2011 4:51 pm

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 1st of Granite.

After a town hearing, myself, the rest of The Comedic Band, and thirteen others have decided to leave the cave and set out to make our fortune elsewhere. More specifically, in a better cave. Because. These self-proclaimed nobles are really dumb. We can't put up with it any more.

Other than the seven of us who formed the original Comedic Band, also coming are a newbie axeman named Sparda, Xusha, Tim Hortans the brewer, Darre the ranger, Flaw of Insanity the furnace operator, Shadow the ~~housemaid~~ engineer, Crystal Lion the armorer, Kaotic (much to my displeasure), MrSebi the miner, Automaton Cubicleurbaning the Subpar Bowyer, Void Shrivelledfrostbite the armorer, Snaketongue Snoweyeschild-size the stonecrafter, and, even more so to my displeasure, Eridan Clawlost the most useless broker ever.

These twenty aren't exactly who I would have gone with, I was hoping Spooky Amazonukkahdettante the carpenter and Orahalcium A-bombscissor-man the mason would come as well, but they wanted to stay in the cave. Oh well. Maybe they'll show up later.

Our journey began this morning. Noticing an odd assortment of supplies in the wagon, I took the time to examine the supply list Eridan had compiled

80 URISTS OF RABBIT MEAT
80 URISTS OF PERCH
40 URISTS OF WILD STRAWBERRIES
32 ROPE REED SEEDS
100 URISTS OF STRAWBERRY WINE
100 URISTS OF LONGLAND BEER
100 URISTS OF FISHER BERRY WINE
100 URISTS OF RIVER SPIRITS
3 BRONZE PICKS
1 STEEL BATTLE AXE
3 BRONZE CROSSBOWS
45 BRONZE BOLTS
CHAMBERINO'S STEEL ANVIL
30 URISTS OF BRAKEN LEATHER
10 URISTS OF ROPE REED FIBER CLOTH
5 URISTS OF SPIDEY-PET SILK CLOTH
5 URISTS OF ILAMA WOOL CLOTH
100 OAK LOGS
3 STEEL BARS
20 BAGS OF SAND
5 URISTS OF RAW GREEN GLASS
5 URISTS OF RAW CLEAR GLASS
5 URISTS OF CRYSTAL GLASS
5 BAGS OF GYPSUM PLASTER
1 BARREL OF VELOCIRAIDER BLOOD (wat)
10 ASSORTED STOLEN STEEL INSTRUMENTS (FLUTES, TRUMPETS, HARPS, DRUMS, PICCOLOS) (wat)
36 LAW PESTER CAGES
40 OAKEN BARRELS
2 OAKEN BUCKETS
4 VELOCIRAIDER LEATHER WATERSKINS
3 VELOCIRAIDER LEATHER QUIVERS
4 VELOCIRAIDER LEATHER BACKPACKS
3 ROPE REED FIBER BAGS
5 ROPE REED FIBER CLOTH
20 LLAMA WOOL ROPES (wat)
5 OAKEN SPLITS
5 OAKEN CRUTCHES
1 BARREL OF LYE
50 URISTS OF COKE
1 WAGON
2 YAK BULLS
1 ASSAULTMECHA
20 DUCKS (WAIT WHAT)

Before I could ask why weren't bringing any of the adamantine wafers or armour or any of the artifacts. Before I could ask why we were bringing a barrel of velociraider blood, stolen instruments, so many llama wool ropes, twenty ducks, where we even found twenty ducks, or what sort of unit a urist was, we were off, the twenty of us sitting in an oversized wagon with twenty ducks, an assortment of rather odd items and a steel assault mecha trailing behind.

Off to found Dragonrampage II.

by **Tom Gaskarth** Wed Apr 13, 2011 5:12 pm

And thus we go on into new ventures and exciting new prospects.

Let's hope our luck continues and we aren't all killed instantly.

by Peregrine Wed Apr 13, 2011 5:16 pm

Can't go wrong with 20 ducks. Especially if you give each other them a llama wool rope.

by Peregrine Wed Apr 13, 2011 5:53 pm

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 7th of Granite.

Six days after we set out, we arrived at another cave. A better cave. Our first steps inside were tentative, and in the end that caution was warranted, for as we stepped into the cave a voice cried out welcoming us. It went something like:

"WHO DARES TO ENTER THE DOMAIN OF THE ROC METE SLADAISPRAN THE MIGHTY WHO STOLE A -MICROCLINE AMULET- FROM ELKBUTTER IN THE YEAR OF 1, AND THEN PROCEEDED TO STEAL A GABBRO STATUE FROM VILLAINPILLAR IN 2."

She rose up from the depths of her lair to greet us, and we stood frozen in her majesty.

TR's Cave Adventures - Page 4 Roc_by_GENZOMAN

TR's Cave Adventures - Page 4 Roc_by_GENZOMAN

"Crap."

The group decided then to make Eridan our official diplomat and pushed him out in front.

"We were just uhh," he stuttered. "Wondering if you wanted to eat some ducks."

The roc raised an eyebrow.

"We've got lots," he continued.

The roc's response was a terrifying roar. Eridan's response was to wet himself.

The battle that ensued was the most fierce I have ever been a part of, and was made all the more difficult by my companions running around screaming tripping over each other, but finally I prevailed. The roc lay dead at my feet, and its lair was ours.

Showed those nobles.

by Kaotic Wed Apr 13, 2011 5:55 pm

Hahah, I don't see how we could lose a single battle with that mecha..

I like it how everyone has a position and then there's just me. Some old guy with a beard and dreads. Like Tony Alva.

by **Tom Gaskarth** Wed Apr 13, 2011 6:26 pm

#WINNING

by **Cial** Wed Apr 13, 2011 10:10 pm

...Should've caught that thing in a cage.

by V Wed Apr 13, 2011 10:15 pm

#ROCBLOOD

Can we make hats out of it's feathers?

by Peregrine Thu Apr 14, 2011 1:12 am

No.

Cue handful of crappy journals that don't even mention two artifacts that were made because I'm having a lazy day today.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 17th of Granite.
We descended deeper into the roc's lair and discovered to our surprise that there was actually a civilization already down there. I guess the roc had enslaved them and was using them as a labour force around the cave. Unfortunately for our slave labour force, first contact did not end well.

TR's Cave Adventures - Page 4 Doqmqd

I think I just comitted genocide. Feels bad man.

That aside, we've started moving our supplies into the now definitely vacant lair.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 18th of Felsite.
It's taken a whole day but we finally butchered the roc. We also tanned its hide into leather, and I kept one of its feathers for style points. Wow that thing was big. 350 urists of meat and other six hundred urists of fat. We'll never need fat again after this.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 10th of Malachite.
Void went wild and whipped up what could be the snazziest thing ever out of nothing but adamantine. He calls it "reign plate", and if Eridan is to be trusted it's worth 1224000 dwarfbucks.

TR's Cave Adventures - Page 4 Reign

Wow that is snazzy.

Dibs.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 13th of Malachite.
Oh God no.

Migrants.

IT'S JUST LIKE LAST TIME.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 2nd of Limestone.
A fire dragon showed up today and really messed the place up. Outside the cave is nothing but ashes. I was able to strike it down but I wouldn't be surprised if the place is never the same again.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 2nd of Timber.
More migrants. Oh dear. Fortunately for me they're not demanding any titles or whatever. Still, I've decided it's for the best that we start making some bedrooms and a dining hall. Making the cave habitable should be priority #1 right now.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 24th of Timber.
The entrance to the cave is done and everything is finally inside. It's just like the old cave's entrance, a door, followed by cage traps, followed by an assaultmecha. We've already caught some thieves and a light dragon.

Werewolf traders came and left. Since we didn't have any crafts yet I told Eridan just to trade them those instruments. He managed to trade the instruments but he sold way too many. Then again he sold less than I was expecting, so I guess that's improvement. Still, makes you wonder why I don't take over the broker job myself.

I assigned one of the peasants from the last wave named Indoctrinated FatSTDstorm to a mason's workshop and told him to start making tables, chairs, coffers, cabinets, doors, armor stands and weapon racks. He is doing a surprisingly good job at it for a peasant. Especially seeing as he wasn't named for success.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, 24th of Moonshine.
A farmer went insane today and started killing ducks. When I confronted him he attacked me as well and I ended up having to kill him in self defence. We lost eight ducks in total. I feel pretty bad. About the ducks, that is. I've never even seen that farmer before.

Peregrine "Doublemace" Falcon's Journal, I need to start updating this more frequently.
Our booze supplies are totaling zero now. We've constructed a well so we don't all die of thirst but it really sucks and keeps running dry. Hopefully we can get a better well constructed soon.

Flaw has found a way to create synthetic adamantine, so the rest of our metalworking department is hard at work creating some new suits of adamantine armour and some adamantine weapons. As a result I've drafted a few of the more useless migrants we've had into the army as swordsmen and marksmen. Now that we're mass-producing adamantine armour and weapons they lack the quality my gear, Cial's gear, Sparda's gear or Tom's gear have, but that's life.

A nerfkitten showed up and bellowed its challenge at us. Apparently it wanted the roc's lair as its own, and us as playthings! A bop on the head with my mace sorted that thing out. Seriously, I don't know why nerfkittens are classed as being megabeasts of legend up there with rocs and hydras. Nerfkitten causes of death are usually from things like "being stepped on by small children" and "regular ant attacks".

We've declared war against the steppe mastodons in the area after so many injuries in steppe mastodon maulings it stopped being funny. Cial, Sparda, Tom and I have been making it our goal to kill every steppe mastodon that shows up. We've taken about ten down already.

by **Darre** Thu Apr 14, 2011 1:53 am

How does a creating a well replenish our stores of booze? Sense, it does not make any.

by Peregrine Thu Apr 14, 2011 2:02 am

Before the well's construction we were living entirely off booze. Now we are living off of water instead.

by **Darre** Thu Apr 14, 2011 2:18 am

That's a stupid decision. Send the peasants out for booze, cus' water sucks.

by **Cial** Thu Apr 14, 2011 2:33 am

NO MORE BOOZE?

BUT I USE THE BOOZE TO GREASE THE TRAPS.

by **Erik** Thu Apr 14, 2011 6:35 am

I like booze.

I feel that we need to kill any migrants who ask for more than we feel the want to give out.

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